Sarcastic Wish List #1

C'mon, sisters. It's time to perk things up around here. Where's the sass?

Let me get things going. I have a sarcastic wish list for this holiday season. Make one of your own. It will be funny. And you'll feel better after you laugh.

Here it is:

1. Toothpaste colored towels. The kids will enjoy this gift as much as I will.

2. A countertop garbage can. Because you know it is so freaking hard for some people to turn around and take two steps to the actual kitchen garbage.

3. A piano. When my non-MacStewart family members act up, I can play the melodramatic music in the background.

4. A giant mirror that I can carry around with me wherever I go. If someone misbehaves, I can just hold the mirror up to him. People don't realize what they look like when they are being donkeys.

Ta Da!


Now you.

The Cold Hard Truth

I cannot deny the truth any longer...

Someone is stealing my silverware. Or throwing it away. Either way, I'm down nine forks and eight teaspoons over the past five years. I will be checking to see if Thanksgiving added to the deficit...

Dancing Queen

Don't mind my messy living room. Just watch 'til the end for a little laugh. I'm nervous about posting anything showing my munchkin, so I might delete it after a few days. That means you, my dear sisters, should watch it while you can!

Ready to Roll

Confidential to Sister #1:

I just sweated my rear end off on the treadmill for two miles. I'm feeling strong and wild and my hands are rolled into tight, neat fists. Bring on the noses...

Love ya!

FYI

Chocolate Mint Pie and Lemonade don't taste good together.

Just thought you should know.

Job Change

Here's the best reason ever to quit my job and become a stay-at-home-mom...

My office smells like raw sewage and rotten cabbage.

Gag, gag, barf, barf.

A Plan!

Ready for some popcorn and an extra bottle of white wine?

I can't wait for all of us to be together again...only two weeks to go!